I have failed you, gentle reader. Last night, I clopped down the hill to Miller Park to catch the final game of the reach-around wrap-around series with the Cardinals. Various Mother’s Day obligations precluded me from attending what is becoming the Brewers’ annual Pink Bat Party on Sunday.
On Monday night, I joined a pretty good crowd of more than 25,000 to watch the Crew beat up on the birds. After their ace pitcher gave up his second home run to Ryan Braun, the home plate umpire called his first pitch to Corey Hart a ball. I didn’t see the pitch, but apparently Cardinals cather Yadier Molina didn’t like the call because he started fuh-reaking out.
The umpire tossed him immediately, because arguing balls and strikes is an automatic ejection (is this a lame rule? Talk amongst yourselves). So Molina is throwing a fit, right up in the ump’s face, and the manager Tony LaRussa comes out and tries to get between them. I honestly though Molina was going to punch the ump. He starts to walk away, then he sort of stops and you can see him thinking..
And then he starts taking off all of his catcher gear and littering it about the plate. “Fuck this!” Here’s the right leg guards! “Fuck that!” Here’s the left leg guards! Then he starts to walk back a little… “Fucking ump!” Here’s the bib chest pad, annnnnd spike the helmet!
It was awesome.
Bravo, sir. Once Molina got back to the dugout, it was apparent LaRussa was going to get tossed as well. So it became just another dust-up, predictable and boring and delaying more baseball until LaRussa got the heave and left. Then a bat boy scurried out and collected Molina’s kit like The Executioner from “Showtime at the Apollo.”
However, I don’t have a photo to show you because I was too busy hooting and hollering.
Sorry to keep pimpin Will Leitch, but he stated this pretty well the other day on Deadspin:
One of the reasons we decided to skip out on the whole sportswriting/beat reporting business, back when we had the opportunity, was the perfectly legitimate fear that we would become burned out on sports. Sports is a diversion, something that should be used as an brief alternative to regular daily life rather than a replacement. We feared those roles might switch, if we were forced to watch sports, rather than doing so by choice.
So yeah, I was busy being a fan, and that’s why you’re S.O.L. on seeing Molina’s yardsale. If I was busy being a good fan I would have snapped the picture anyway, but then again if I was a good fan I might not have gone for nachos and missed a Bill Hall homer. So I will default to the excuses that 1. I have a lousy digi-cam, and B. I’m an idiot.